Susahnyer mencari ketenangan jiwa...sukarnya menjadi org biaser..

Monday,

Mar

24,

Hi miss diary...hari nih zar sakit...susahnya nak melarikan diri kali nihs..kalau sebelum nih zar boleh escape from the pain by neglecting..kenapa susah sangat nak melepaskan diri kali nihs...feels like...hah..couldn't breath...

I was given two choices..satu kerje yg mencabar..but just thinking of it 'll stressed me out..yg satu lagi akan menjadikan aku seorang yg pemalas....it is maybe not me or it is sooo me what d h*** I've chosen the 2nd one...owhhh god...I thought I would be free...but day by day..I was getting bitten bite by bite...Ya Allah.. thinking if I could possibly choosen the wrong decision...How could it be wrong?..I've consulted almost everybody...and they are thingking of about the same...unless..I've been been crazily drove them prior to that by telling how miserable the pther job would be...goshhh...what a shame....

Minggu lepas Zar dah rasa lega dah..ader one good news strucked me a little..giving me a new tiny hope...tapi then the weekend I saw my brother....and he sarcastically said "Zar!!!!!!!! what've you done? entering data?? people will laugh of you when they see your resume!" gosh..I hate that when he said that but how could I deny that..it is true...

Harinih pulak ader meeting with Faizal and En B..I'm still a part of them....I missed Mtce..and keep thinking why Mr BS has come into the picture..

hahahhah....wonder why I started to ask 'why'..I should've prohibited my self from saying this word when it comes to fate...everything should've come for a reason....just the same reason why suddenly today I have another things that pressed me down...Allah....smlm pon Zura brain wash me..and the famous word came again..the comfort zone...damn...

Penat rasanya..sebal hati nih...lama dah x menangis...rasa nak menangis jer..biar air mata yg mengalir sedikit sebanyak membawa pergi dikit rasa pilu..deep pain..as synonym as Hasrah to my name..letih nak berlari...ntah kenapa harus aku berlari aku pon tatau....

tatau...